Love & Trust

by Donya B
Betrayal of Love

Image: Jo So Lovely on Tumblr

You can’t trust him as far as you can throw him, can you?  You already saw her pictures in his email, but he swears that’s over.  Yet every time his phone rings, you watch his face and wonder if he’s going to take it out of the room.  He says he’s going to his sister’s house, so you call an hour later just to check.    But when he holds you in his arms, all of your doubts and fears disappear.  You love him with all your heart and you know he loves you too.  You just don’t trust him.

I’ve struggled with that concept for years, Love without Trust.  I guess it’s like when you’ve gotten popped by grease enough times, you realize you can’t cook bacon without expecting it.  If you want the bacon, you have to know there is a great chance you will get popped.  When you fall in love, know you may end up not trusting that person.  Call me crazy, but that sounds ridiculous and pathetic.  Why love someone you know is probably lying to you and doing exactly what you hope they’re not doing every time they leave your sight?  Is love that strong of an emotion? In a word, Yes.

Trust issues go well beyond significant others.  It invades family relationships just as easily.  You have a hard time visiting your brother and his wife because she was your fiancée less than a year before.  Your aunt watches you like a hawk when you come over because when you were a teen, you stole money out of her purse.  Your son was just released from jail, for the second time, and wants to move back home. Again.  There’s no trust, but there is still love.

Real trust requires forgiveness.  Forgiveness requires you to forget.  But we’re human; do we really have that capacity?  Can we actually forget when someone hurts us? We can say we forgive, but if you haven’t wiped the slate clean, you haven’t truly forgiven.  And if you haven’t forgiven, you can’t truly trust.  So now what do we do? Either you continue to love while peeking around corners and hacking emails or you actually let go of the pain.  Forget it happened.  Truly forgive, not just in your mind, but in your heart.  You can’t change the past, so why live in it?  Free yourself from the hurt and worry and love with an open heart.  Cook bacon naked.

Today’s Truffle:  Life isn’t as difficult as we tend to make it.  Learn to let go.


Ms. De

About Donya: Donya Vaughn is a So Cal native, collegiate of San Diego State University and graduate of the University of Life, mastering in “Wow, That Was Harder Than It Needed To Be”. Known to her close friends as “The Walking Encyclopedia”, Donya prides herself in being helpful, knowledgeable and ready to serve. She uses these traits along with unwavering optimism and Christian good spirit regularly as owner and consultant of As You Like… Wedding & Event Services.

One Comment to “Love & Trust”

  1. Thank you, I really needed to read this right now.

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